Once in a while, I get an
e-mail from someone who wants to know how I do to separate business
from pleasure without affecting my personal life. For those interested
here is what I have to say about it.
Splitting business from pleasure
is not something I�m trying to do. I�m a �jouisseuse� which means
someone who tries to get as much pleasure from life especially those
sensual ones like sex and food. But about the meaning of that question,
I would say that the pleasure I get from my work is very different
than the pleasure I get in my personal life. In that sense, I don�t
have much effort to do to keep the two separated. One of the reason
I refuse same day or last minute calls is that I like to set myself
in a special space before an appointment. I try to meditate before
a date so I�m focus and in a giving mode. When I don�t take the
time to do it before an appointment, I know that I�m not being at
my best.
To serve people is a highly
rewarding spiritual experience and that is what I�m trying to achieve
during an appointment. But for this to happen, I need a soul connection
with my customer and not only a physical experience. Someone who
thinks he can order me around because he is paying me or someone
who needs a body without a soul is not the right customer for me.
One great turn on in my personal life that is more difficult to
find on a business date is the seduction/hunting game. I know that
for a lot of you it�s a hassle you are glad to get rid off with
an escort. For me, not knowing the result of a date, and working
to get what I want is the most exciting part of dating. In that
light, I greatly appreciate the customer who still makes the effort
of trying to seduce me even if he is a regular. I guess it�s because
I�m a woman before being a SP and I don�t like seeing myself as
an �easy girl�.
For all those reasons and
despite all the pleasure I get from work, the business don�t satisfy
my need to crave for someone. This is one thing that I can only
find in my personal life. Another part of the question is about
how I do to not be affected by my work in my personal life. Well,
I think it�s impossible to not be affected by it but it is not always
in a negative way. One thing for sure is that it�s more difficult
(not impossible) to find a boyfriend. Some made me choose between
work and them� they lost. Too bad for them because I believe to
be a good catch! Sure I could try to hide it like some of my friends
do but I�m really looking for someone confident, mature and open
mind enough to not be feel threatened by my work or my other sexual
experiences.
I�ve now been almost 5 years
in this business, 2 of which I spent with a boyfriend (I�m currently
single for those who wonder- This is not an invitation in trying
to date me). This work when I am single and when I have a boyfriend
doesn�t have the same effect on me. Before going on about the �side
effects� of the job with or without a boyfriend, I�ll talk about
the changes it had in me no matter the context. One positive aspect
is that my confidence is much stronger. The positive feedbacks you
guys keep saying me made me grow from a mature girl into a woman,
a real strong one. This is so much true that most people at university
find me intimidating. They sense something about me that they can�t
quite put their finger on and they keep a respectful distance. My
friends are the ones that knew me from before or the ones that overcame
that challenge. I guess that it is another reason why I�m looking
for an older boyfriend because I scare guys of my age even if I�m
a sweetie when you know me.
The changes have seen on my
sex life are huge. I�m now much better at giving BJ than when I
started. My lovemaking hasn�t changed much (I must have been a natural
at it). My HJ technique hasn�t improve a bit, I still suck at it
because I have weak arms and I�m scare to hurt you. Anyway it doesn�t
matter because I don�t like it and I know that it will never be
as good as when you do it yourself. KISSING. What a big issue! This
is the one thing I decided to keep for my personal life and the
affects are major. Before I started this business, kissing was no
big deal. When I was a teenager, I even used to make contests with
my girlfriends to see which one would kiss more guys in an evening
than the other.
Now things has changed, a
kiss has become my most valuable and meaningful sex act. I�ve become
really picky about who I�m kissing. I don�t kiss anymore for fun
(see what will happen) nor to please someone but only when I really
want it. A good kiss with the person of my choice has become way
more precious than any orgasm I could get. That is what makes my
heart race and my legs shaky. Another thing I�ve notice is that
my tolerance for long lovemaking session as considerably dropped.
I now prefer to have 3 short sessions than a long one. I even surprised
myself being momentarily aggressive (in my head) toward my boyfriend
because he was taking �too much time�. That is something that had
never happened to me before.
Here is one popular saying
that is so true : �The more you have sex, the more you want it�.
You would think that after seeing 3 customers in a day I would have
want to rest but no. I used to have sex with my boyfriend after
everyday I worked. If the sex I got with customers that day was
not really my style (a good escort try to adjust herself to the
other even by guessing it�s style of lovemaking), then sex with
my boyfriend would have a �cleansing� effect. If sex with customers
was good for me then it got even better with my man. That is something
I miss not having a boyfriend. It seems that there was a balance
I achieved with work and a love one that I can�t quite reach now.
Another thing about that saying
is that I find it more difficult to work part-time in this business
than full time. When I�m really busy with my business, there is
an adrenaline rush that I get from it that feels very good. I feel
I can do anything, I feel super sexy, a superwoman. When business
is less busy or I take 2 weeks off, I find it more difficult to
come back to work. It�s as I would have lost the touch or I�m not
sure about it anymore. I know it makes no sense but it�s how I feel.
Another effect this business had on my single life is that my interest
in one nightstands has dropped. When you don�t know the person and
ignore if you are compatible sexually, then there is a lot of chance
that you�ll be disappointed. It then feels more like work than anything
else and worse, I�m not paid for it. Unless someone makes me really
gaga, I�ll stick to my current lovers that I call once in a while
when the need for it comes.
I know that I�ve been brutally
honest in this post and I hope you weren�t too offended to hear
the real side of the story, when the show is over.
Written by Annik
Her Web page